You probably know someone who refuses to leave a relationship where she’s constantly abused by her husband or boyfriend. You may be in that situation yourself. And now you are asking why you can’t just leave.
You can always talk to Denver divorce lawyers about your plan to leave your abusive husband — and you should definitely leave him — but “getting out” is not as easy as people who have never been in the same situation seem to always think. When you’ve been abused for a long time and are only beginning to gain some clarity about it, your reasons for staying may not be easy to identify.
Here are some reasons you may find it difficult to leave an abusive relationship. After reading this, hopefully, you will gain a new resolve to finally get help and get out.
Fear of being judged, blamed, and ridiculed
Typical abusive men exhibit a chameleon-like trait of adopting an amiable personality around other people, which is partly why it may be difficult for others to believe that he is abusing you. If you just tried to leave now, you may experience a deep fear of how other people will see you. Victim blaming or shaming is an embarrassing facet of human existence.
You have to come to terms with the fact that you are not to blame, no matter what other people say. Otherwise, you may never leave.
He says you’re crazy and delusional. He does this so often that after a few months or years of the same, you might begin to think he might be telling the truth. It’s manipulation, another powerful ally of the abusive person. Some women are affected by gaslighting so much that they begin to ask themselves if a crazy person (themselves) would know if they were crazy. This is one of the most dangerous and long-lasting effects of abuse.
No, you are not crazy. Get help now before the effects of the psychological torture become even worse.
Fear of retaliation
An abusive spouse may resort to desperate measures if their partner leaves or attempts to leave them. Stalking, rape, beating and worse have been known to happen to poor women who dared walk away. Abusive husbands may even hurt their spouse’s friends and family.
You may find it almost impossible to leave if you believe your husband is capable of such evils, but take courage in knowing that there are people who can help you. Your lawyer, the court, the police, your friends and family can help you get through this.
There is no point in staying on if you are in an abusive marriage, even if you love him. You need help, and you need it now. Your lawyer can help you in many ways, including ensuring you are protected. Make the call now, before it’s too late.